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by Diane on July 13, 2009

[caption id="attachment_2073" align="alignleft" width="134" caption="Jon and Maureen in Happier Days"]Jon and Maureen in Happier Days[/caption]

H BUY ZYLORIC NO PRESCRIPTION, ow many times have you heard about a missing person case?  To be sure there are hundreds of thousands of Americans reported missing every year. Some come right back home, ZYLORIC wiki. My ZYLORIC experience, But too often families of the missing either get the horrible news that their loved one's body has been found or they continue to suffer with the quiet torment of no news at all. Then there is the group of missing people who aren't really missing at all, ZYLORIC cost. Doses ZYLORIC work, They are hiding. They're called the "maliciously missing" by a woman who knows the subject all too well, BUY ZYLORIC NO PRESCRIPTION. Her name is Maureen Reintjes and on May 19, buy generic ZYLORIC, ZYLORIC overnight, 2005 she kissed goodbye her husband of 24 years at their new home in Las Vegas, Nevada and he disappeared, ZYLORIC class. ZYLORIC images, No warning, no reason, ZYLORIC dosage, ZYLORIC description, he was just gone.  Jon Van Dyke, a retired Marine master sergeant knew about responsibility, ZYLORIC canada, mexico, india, ZYLORIC interactions, he seemed happy with their new life and

[caption id="attachment_2074" align="alignright" width="178" caption="Jon Van Dyke Disappeared - Voluntarily"]Jon Van Dyke Disappeared - Voluntarily[/caption]

his new job at the CitiGroup Command Center. They'd worked hard getting their home in shape for a pending family reunion, buy ZYLORIC from mexico. Effects of ZYLORIC, "He would never just leave me," Maureen thought, herbal ZYLORIC. BUY ZYLORIC NO PRESCRIPTION, For the next four years Maureen's anguish over what terrible event must have happened to her husband was compounded by her financial realities. Discount ZYLORIC, She lost their home and then another one. She was homeless for a while, buy ZYLORIC without prescription, ZYLORIC steet value, struggling mightily to make sense of it all. She spent her days working, buy cheap ZYLORIC no rx, Is ZYLORIC addictive, her nights on the computer setting up an internet presence to help locate Jon, getting military friends and family to help disseminate the news that he was missing, ZYLORIC pharmacy. ZYLORIC over the counter, Late into the night Maureen scoured the web sites of coroners across America looking for information on unidentified bodies, not wanting to find Jon among the dead but desperately looking for the truth, ZYLORIC blogs. Then, on Maureen's birthday, May 11, 2009, and one week shy of four years after he chose to walk away, Jon walked back into her life, BUY ZYLORIC NO PRESCRIPTION. ZYLORIC used for, He offered no real information on why he left or where he'd been. He wanted a divorce, buy ZYLORIC from canada. ZYLORIC schedule, Fresh with this new hurt Maureen is still dumbfounded. "I don't know how to feel, online buying ZYLORIC, ZYLORIC price, coupon, " she told me. BUY ZYLORIC NO PRESCRIPTION, "I have lots of different emotions - but my emotion is nameless." After her brief contact with Jon and court officers she came away thinking that maybe he'd had a mental breakdown or a stroke, "I was looking at my husband's body but the man speaking - it was not his personality." The harsh reality is, it is not against the law to do what Jon Van Dyke did. Others share Maureen's anguish, ZYLORIC results. Get ZYLORIC, Just recently a man named David Rockney resurfaced in Bartlesville, Oklahoma after having been gone 7 years. He went off to what he told his family was a job interview in a nearby town one day and never came back. His wife, Peggy, and the family battled the pain of loss and uncertainty over Rockney's fate. Police continued to work his missing persons case whenever there was a tip, BUY ZYLORIC NO PRESCRIPTION. Rockney's disappearing act unraveled when he presented his expired driver's license to the South Dakota Department of Public Safety so he could get a new one. He now explains his reason for leaving was "personal" and that he survived doing odd off-the-books jobs in Kansas, Nebraska and South Dakota. Peggy has filed for divorce. Since there is no specific law to stop someone who decides they want to erase the old and start anew there is no relief for the tortured families they leave behind. BUY ZYLORIC NO PRESCRIPTION, With the economy as bad as it is authorities fear increasing financial pressures will cause a rise in the number of these maliciously missing cases. No one has the right to simply walk away from mortgage payments, utility bills, child support and other court mandated payments. The problem comes, of course, in locating and bringing to justice those who deliberately disappear to escape the obligations of life. No telling how many people are in Maureen's shoes now, combing through corner's websites and news reports looking for any clue. Imagine their task. There are now estimated to be up to 60 thousand unidentified bodies in the U.S, BUY ZYLORIC NO PRESCRIPTION. and no fully functioning one-stop location to check to see if those bodies match with their missing loved one.

[caption id="attachment_2075" align="alignleft" width="163" caption="Someone Missing. Check Here"]Missing. Check Here[/caption]

A seed of hope has been planted at a publicly searchable repository called the National Missing and Unidentified Persons System or NamUs.org . BUY ZYLORIC NO PRESCRIPTION, It's the first ever registry to combine information on both missing people and found bodies. Sadly, it relies mostly on those in law enforcement who have the time and inclination to enter pertinent information. Not many do. But the public can also enter their missing persons information on the registry in hopes that a match can someday be made. A good first step - with many more to go to help ease the heartache so many American families endure every day. HOME.

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{ 40 comments… read them below or add one }

Maureen July 13, 2009 at 6:41 am

Thanks Diane for a great article. And, thanks for mentioning NamUs in the article! But, everyone please know NamUs is for ALL! And any law enforcement, any families of the missing, any coroners, medical examiners, etc, that are reading here please know this tool is only powerful if you all submit your cases!!!!! I call on the public to check with your local law enforcement and encourage them to make use of this tool, and if they need help then volunteer to enter cases for them! http://www.namus.gov

Maureen Reintjes

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Maureen July 13, 2009 at 6:43 am

I am proposing a law that will end this act of going maliciously missing. I've seen people try to take this down to the marital level and sweep the real issues under the rug. This has nothing to do with a marriage but everything to do with what should be considered criminal actions. If the act itself present day is not considered criminal then what about all the laws the maliciously break while in hiding? Emotional abuse inflicted on the family, not paying taxes, use of fake IDs, assuming fake names and identities, getting paid under the table, the list could go on and on.

In all likelihood most that go maliciously missing are suffering from mental and/or medical problems but their spouses are barred from getting them evaluated. The law I propose does not take anyone's freedom away it just makes them responsible and it gives the families answers right away. No family should ever have to go through the hell my family did, where were our rights in all of this? Where was our freedom?

Maureen Reintjes

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Maureen July 13, 2009 at 6:45 am

Proposed Law:

Anyone 16 or older who decides to walk away from their life must present themselves to any law enforcement agency in the country within X amount of hours and sign a statement that this is their wish. Law enforcement will need to gather proof that the person standing in front of them is who they say they are. Snapping a photo of the person, fingerprinting and obtaining and entering a DNA swab (national database?) from the person. Law enforcement will then have X amount of hours to notify the family and provide them concrete proof that this is their loved one who stood before them. Law enforcement should also provide to the person walking away from their lives a list of resources to closest mental health agencies, domestic violence shelters, abuse shelters, rehabs, marriage counselors, etc.

Anyone abusing this system will be fined x amount of dollars.

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Justice4Joanie July 15, 2009 at 6:22 pm

Maureen is my friend. I know how hard she worked to find her husband. And I know the heartache she went through. She is a wonderful human being. And I support her efforts now & I always will. Thank you for supporting her too by writing this article.

Dena Rush
http://www.youtube.com/user/JusticeforJoanieHall

Reply

Glendene Grant July 13, 2009 at 11:11 am

My name is Glendene Grant and my daughter JESSIE FOSTER is a human trafficking victim who has been missing over 3 years, since March 29, 2006. Jessie was taken from Canada to the USA. She was not allowed to leave and when she tried, she went missing.

Jessie is also thought to have become the victim of the 'truck driver/highway serial killer'.
Maureen and I have become friends over the years, as her husband Jon and my daughter Jessie both went missing from Las Vegas, NV.

Is there anyone out there that can help us find her?
_______________________________________________
REWARD: $50,000 to the person who helps us find Jessie
WEBSITE: http://jessiefoster.ca
FORUM: http://findjessie.com
BLOG: http://jessiefoster.blogspot.com
TWITTER: http://twitter.com/MissingJessie
AMERICA'S MOST WANTED: http://www.amw.com/missing_persons/brief.cfm?id=6
ABC NIGHTLINE: Hunting Humans on the Highways: http://abcnews.go.com/video/playerIndex?id=758259
2009 TRAFFICKING IN PERSONS REPORT: http://www.state.gov/g/tip/rls/tiprpt/2009/index….

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Delilah1234 July 13, 2009 at 11:43 am

Thanks, Diane, for bringing this case to light. Not only are the families devastated emotionally and financially, the people who choose to go "maliciously missing" have wasted many taxpayers dollars and manpower to search for them, as well as private search and recovery agencies who are run by donations from the public.

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Todd Matthews July 13, 2009 at 9:00 pm

Good going Maureen!

Diane — love to see you do a more in depth piece on NamUs.gov

-Todd Matthews

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Suzan July 13, 2009 at 1:16 pm

I once had a similar case. I found the father to be living with a nature group in N. Washington. He planned and faked his own death (through rumors). I traced him through his girlfriends elderly Mother. My client had hired me to find her poor fathers grave.. bitter/sweet. There should be a law to prevent this.. one can wish* :)

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Donald Ross July 13, 2009 at 2:20 pm

I was reborn when I became a father and a husband, who would give up such a precious gift? http://www.projectjason.org/ http://findjesseross.com

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Suzan July 13, 2009 at 8:47 pm

Aw…Your so right…Our children are precious. How are you and how was your trip to Chicago? Did you find any new info?

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Suzan July 13, 2009 at 8:50 pm

oh and.. I did a video of my feelings of becoming a parent. If you want to see it, it's on my youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=al1SPsfSo30

My post's don't seem to be showing up on here..weird, maybe the mod is away??

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Suzan July 13, 2009 at 3:39 pm

Aw… yes Donald..I feel the same way. I did a video of my feelings of becoming a parent. If you want to see it, it's on my youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=al1SPsfSo30
How are you these days? and how was the trip to Chicago, did you get any answers? You can chat with me if you want (as we are on each others yahoo)

God Bless

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Suzan July 13, 2009 at 4:03 pm

Aw… yes Donald..I feel the same way. I did a video of my feelings of becoming a parent. If you want to see it, it's on my youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=al1SPsfSo30
How was your trip to Chicago, and how are you these days?

God Bless

Reply

The other side July 14, 2009 at 1:22 am

Has anyone considered that if this is true "In all likelihood most that go maliciously missing are suffering from mental and/or medical problems", making it harder to leave without repercussions from LE, many mentally ill and desperate people might commit suicide? or worse Murder/suicide? I fear many people who leave voluntarily do so because they feel they have no other options and they are at the end of their rope. It may not be fair to all concerned, but if "In all likelihood most that go maliciously missing are suffering from mental and/or medical problems" then these people are not MALICIOUS, they are mentally ill.
Not to mention that we ONLY require DNA, fingerprints and mugshots from criminals. And you want to collect such DNA before anyone even leaves? I don't think you have thought this one out.

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DianeDimond July 14, 2009 at 5:37 am

Oh, I've thought it out. I simply wrote this column from the viewpoint of the loved ones left behind. ~ DD

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Sara Huizenga July 15, 2009 at 5:24 am

Diane, thank you for your professional grace that seems to effortlessly pour out into your printed words, creating these stories that envoke and compell the hearts of many to not only care more about our fellow humankind, but to also actively act upon it…by doing more for them as well.

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Maureen July 14, 2009 at 12:18 pm

The other side,

Yes, of course they are mentally ill but that tag does nothing. We have little rights as spouses and legally we can't get our loved ones evaluated and seek intervention. As for the DNA swab well if you are a spouse of a missing person there are many legal things that come into play that don't happen in other missing situations. Property, trust, insurance, etc. Even if the spouse is walking away from his/her life but doesn't pursue divorce yet becomes deceased during this period how is the left behind spouse ever going to know what legal avenues to follow? How will they know their spouse has passed? DNA entered into a national database will certainly help alleviate those questions. Trust me as spouse's I have found out we have little rights. I had to get a court order for everything I did.

Also, in the case of a teenager who is off starting a new life they are still someone's daughter/son and the family has a right to know if their child met with foul play while pursuing a new life.

Maureen

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The other side July 14, 2009 at 5:49 pm

You know what, Maureen? That mentally ill tag does mean something. It means people are in distress, people are sick and not always in control of themselves. We do recognize this as illness not malicious behavior. You remind me of the days when people thought the mentally ill should be warehoused or locked up in the attic so they didn't embarass anyone. We have grown, as a society, past all that. We do recognize mental illness as an illness like any other, one in which the person SUFFERING is the VICTIM, not a criminal. They are not malicious, they are victims of an illness. Your terminology is really quite offensive.

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Sara Huizenga July 15, 2009 at 5:30 am

No offense, but…okay, go ahead and take offense, it makes no difference to me, truth be told…because your comments here are so beyond inappropriate, you are purposefully attacking Maureen, quite obviously in even a personal sense. For whatever traumatic reason or circumstance that must have occured in your own life to create this strong disdain for others within you…I truly do feel for you…however, your decision to verbally abuse a grieving, hurting, obvious victim is beyond distasteful, not to mention quite transparent.

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deskside July 15, 2009 at 5:53 am

You say, "They are not malicious, they are victims of an illness" but in another post you say "Yet you want any runaway adult to be forced to undergo medical/mental evaluation? Who would pay for all of this?" So it's a loving kind thing to do NOT to get someone help? We treat our pets better than that. So you would rather pay for for the law enforcement investigations and searches that go on for years? And, no one is talking about warehousing the mentally ill. An evaluation and then the individual can decide their own course of treatment if a diagnosis is made during that evaluation. And, if you read the law I'm not even proposing evaluations. But it should be the wife of 28 years right to be able to ask for an evaluation for the person she loves. And, my husband's evaluation would be paid for as he has insurance for life…but I guess we all do pay for that one, happily as a thank you to someone who fought for this country and served it for 20 years.

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Donald Ross July 14, 2009 at 7:37 pm

If a spouse leaves, there needs to be a determination as to why. This person is not relieved of responsibility for their family, so if there is mental illness then it still needs to be addressed and the needs of the family addressed. for LE to say he's an adult he can do what he wants. Not unless he is metally ill and then he belongs in an institution until he can accept his responsibilities.

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Jeff Liddell July 14, 2009 at 9:39 am

Although I don't usually cry on other's shoulders and keep my problems to myself, my personal experiences are relating rather closely to this story, so here goes for what it is worth to your readers.

I suffered a heart attack in February 08, fortunately my health insurance was still intact at that time in the stent implants were covered. Since that time my wife has lost her job and therefore health insurance is also gone. I live on my railroad disability annuity which keeps me above poverty level. My wife has not returned to work and is seeking her railroad disability at this time. With our bills based upon two incomes, our situation has grown rather dim and getting darker. Yes I have wondered what it would be like to drop out of this life and into another one, but is that not a form of suicide, just happen to keep breathing with this one. Mark Twain once said, "If one comes to believe themselves worthless they either commit suicide or travel". I believe that most of the "malicious
missing" are stressed to the point of feeling trapped in their own personal quagmire and are probably in need of some counseling and then surely there are those that just want to explore what they think to be greener pastures. Quitting on your problems before they are solved only serves to delay dealing with the inevitable.

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Stephanie July 14, 2009 at 12:36 pm

That proposed law is utterly ridiculous. I cannot begin to understand or imagine the pain a family would go through when a loved one disapears, but to make it a law stating that you have to TELL someone you want to disapear, totally defeats the purpose and is not what makes our country a free one. You have to tell the government so they can tell your family? What's the point? Any legal adult has the right to "disapear", no matter what pain it causes others. Hopefully you don't have someone in your life who would do that to you.

Of course there are mitigating circumstances, people with mental illness and such. But what would make you think they would follow this law anyways?

That proposed law completely defeats the purpose, and it would be constantly broken.

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Donald Ross July 14, 2009 at 7:41 pm

No one has the right to just disappear, not when you take on the financial and emotional commitment to a family. Otherwise people would be divorcing and leaving spouse and children in poverty. There is a responsibility.

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Sara Huizenga July 15, 2009 at 5:32 am

Thank You, Donald…voice of reason that many respect and look up to…

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The other side July 14, 2009 at 1:25 pm

I should also point out that this article is from the viewpoint of only some loved ones left behind. Many other families are just frantic for news, and make a point of telling the press their missing loved one is welcome home no matter what. Not everyone left behind turns bitter, angry and determined to get "justice". This law would do a huge disservice to any voluntarily missing adult, especially those in emotional distress. It simply adds to the reasons not to try to come home. Not to mention that we have enough trouble getting LE to even take missing adult reports. This law would simply add to an overworked LE. This proposed law is not likely to pass constitutional muster anyway. TG

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deskside July 14, 2009 at 4:09 pm

Just at what point in all the years of not knowing where my husband was do you think I was not frantic? I was on the airways and the Internet and you can go to the Missing Pieces Radio show where I state that my husband knew that he could always come home. And, I've got news for you what you see in the media is maybe .5% of the missing cases that exist. Missing male adults are the least concern of law enforcement and media. I have fought to change that. You act like mine was just a case of a jilted wife….to be just the jilted wife sounds like heaven compared to what I went through! 4 years of hell. I couldn't even fill out a simple form: Married, Divorced, Widowed? There is no "Other' on forms but that's what I was.

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deskside July 14, 2009 at 4:12 pm

The law I propose won't help me but it will help other families from having to go through this. And, it does help the person who is walking away from their life, they don't have to go under cover, hide, and break all sorts of laws in doing so. They don't have to put themselves into high risk life styles with total strangers just to start a new life. They simply state to law enforcement their intent and law enforcement lets the family know that there loved one presented themselves and wishes to start a new life. Law enforcement won't be required to tell the family where their loved one is, just to notify them that it is their loved one's intent to start a new life. Beside it would do away with "voluntary missing" as they would not be missing…they won't be lost to have to be found!

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Sara Huizenga July 15, 2009 at 5:39 am

My, you certainly do seem to have quite a bit of personal feelings invested into this…do you mind sharing more so about who you are and why this article has obviously created such intense anger, seemingly need for revenge, obvious desire to attack/lash out at the victims of this article as well as the overwhelmingly, internal distress within your own life?

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Sara Huizenga July 14, 2009 at 5:03 pm

I just cannot begin to imagine the devastating pain the families of the maliciously missing are forced to endure…to go from (and often enduring all at once)…continually and desperately looking for a missing loved one, to fearing for their lives, to unwillingly imagining countless horrific scenarios of what could have occured, to endlessly grieving for the one seemingly lost AND THEN to be so cruely and viciously abused by this very person you had dedicated your life to finding as they suddenly make a ghostly reappearance as a cold shell of the person you once knew, void of remorse, showing no emotion…

How does one cope with THAT?!

Can you even begin to imagine what literally walking in their shoes might entail? Would you be strong enough to even take the first step their road towards healing requires?

As human beings capable of showing compassion to others, we have a responsiblity to reach out to these victims wth our encouragement and support.

And Diane Dimond, you have done such an incredible job of doing just that! Thanks so very much for your leading example to us all!

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The other side July 14, 2009 at 5:44 pm

"We have little rights as spouses and legally we can't get our loved ones evaluated and seek intervention." That's right. Spouses have few rights but taking away the rights of other adults is not the answer. You cannot force people to seek medical attention unless they pose a danger to themselves or others. This is the law. Yet you want any runaway adult to be forced to undergo medical/mental evaluation? Who would pay for all of this? How many extra cops would it take in a place, say like LA, to handle all these "reporting myself as going missing" cases? We can't get enough cops/time/or money to handle the existing crimes being committed. This is just a crazy idea born out of one person's angst and not reflective of the attitude of most missing persons' families to begin with.

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Maureen July 15, 2009 at 4:32 am

Who is taking away any rights? Do you not know how to read? There is nothing in that law taking anyone's rights away. But, it will save us the tax payers from paying for law enforcement investigations and searches that go on for YEARS! The maliciously missing don't even pay taxes during their missing years so they aren't even helping with the costs. What I propose is very humane way not to put families through emotional hell for a lifetime. No one is stopping the person from disappearing. And, what is wrong with seeking medical or psychological intervention for your loved one? My husband didn't have a good vein in his body, per his doctor, which means this whole thing could have been caused by stroke or multiple strokes. And, that is not in my law that I propose … there is nothing in there addressing evaluations.

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Maureen July 15, 2009 at 4:45 am

I am the father of a missing man "Trevor Morse" 06 May 2007 Las Vegas Nevada . Each and every day over the last two years has been filled with pain and depression. My wife has Lupus and stress aggravates her condition. Families deserve answers whatever they are. I believe this law would at least help families with some type of closure, whether the person is mentally competent, malicious or just misguided walking away is not a humane, fair, or equitable resolution to a real or perceived problem. That is the responsibility of being an adult.

It is sad to say that LE really does not want to be bothered when the person is an adult male, the criteria of importance seems to be Rich / Famous / Children / about in that order.

I have known Maureen over two years, since the time our Trevor went missing; she was introduced to us by Kelly Jolkowski , Mother of Missing Jason Jolkowski. She has been an inspiration and a stout shoulder for us.

Thank You Maureen

Rick Morse

http://www.myspace.com/missing_trevor_morse

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bad idea July 14, 2009 at 10:03 pm

This is just craziness. Why should we want to hurt these mentally ill people even more with this attitude? This would not make anybody want to come home!

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Morse July 17, 2009 at 4:04 pm

I am the father of a missing man "Trevor Morse" 06 May 2007 Las Vegas Nevada. Each and every day over the last two years has been filled with pain and depression. My wife has Lupus and stress aggravates her condition. Families deserve answers whatever they are. I believe this law would at least help families with some type of closure, whether the person is mentally competent, malicious or just misguided walking away is not a humane, fair, or equitable resolution to a real or perceived problem. That is the responsibility of being an adult.
It is sad to say that LE really does not want to be bothered when the person is an adult male, the criteria of importance seems to be Rich / Famous / Children / about in that order.
I have known Maureen over two years, since the time our Trevor went missing; she was introduced to us by Kelly Jolkowski, Mother of Missing Jason Jolkowski. She has been an inspiration and a stout shoulder for us.
Thank You Maureen

Rick Morse
MySpace
http://www.myspace.com/missing_trevor_morse

Reply

Malinda Hoyt July 21, 2009 at 3:16 pm

I pray that the "other side" never has to endure what the families of missing are going though (or are you one of the "missing"?). My young adult daughter , Emiliie, has been missing for over 3 years and I know that she had emotional problems and was trying to become a responsible adult. None of us who love her and miss her would ever want hurt her but would REJOICE to know that she is alive. Until I know otherwise there will be pain but still the hope that maybe, just MAYBE, she is just "out there" – just lost, physically and emotionally. Reporting to LE would be an OPPORTUNITY to get the support and help needed and bring some resolution to the family left behind.
Thank you Maureen.
Mother of Emillie Hoyt, missing from Highland Beach, FL since January 2006

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Mark January 25, 2010 at 7:22 pm

While what happened to Maureen was awful, what about young adults escaping abusive or homophobic parents, or domestic violence situations? Will adult children no longer be allowed to cut themselves off from toxic or abusive parents or other family members without having to go to the police? It seems this law would be re-victimizing those of us in situations like this.

I did not go “maliciously missing,” but I did choose to end contact with my family members, mainly for reasons surrounding my mother’s decades-long substance abuse problems. I moved out of state several years ago, and stopped returning their phone calls. I haven’t “gone into hiding” and have committed no crimes. I tolerated their emotional abuse for far too long, and now you’re telling me I have to register with a law enforcement agency?

I haven’t done anything wrong, unless wanting to protect my mental and emotional well-being is a crime.

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Lee February 12, 2010 at 1:03 pm

I am in exactly the same situation as Mark. My father sexually and physically abused me throughout my childhood, and continued to harass and threaten me until I was into my 30s. Whenever I tried to talk to my mother or sister, they would just hand the phone over to my father so he could threaten to “beat the sh*t” out of me yet again. I finally got a rented PO box, an unlisted number, and gave the security officers and secretary at work strict instructions not to give out any personal information about me to anyone, particularly if they claimed to be related to me. It’s been over a decade now, and “disappearing” from my family has been the single most healthy thing I’ve ever done for myself. There is ZERO chance that I would ever consent to turn myself over to the police and consent to be swapped and fingerprinted like a common criminal when I have done nothing wrong, and have done nothing more than exercise my constitutionally protected right to associate with whomever I choose. Just because someone is related to you, that certainly doesn’t mean they have your best interests at heart. Is my family frantically looking for information about me, or broken-hearted? To be honest, I don’t give a damn. Every time my father crept into my bedroom at night, and every time my mother looked the other way, they lost the right to cry, “But we’re her parents!” forever. Period. Granted, I’m not “missing” in the typical way that we define that–I haven’t walked away from my husband; my in-laws and friends know my address and phone number; I hold down a professional job and pay taxes. But if you were hearing only my parents’ side of the story, you’d have a completely different picture, and would mistakenly give them sympathy for a situation of their own creation. And I’m not going to be shamed or hounded into being treated like a criminal because of their continued abusive behavior.

I feel for everyone with a missing family member. But your story isn’t everyone’s story, and to try to change to law to reflect just a specific set of circumstances just isn’t realistic, either situationally or Constitutionally. Plenty of adults have legitimate reasons to cut off contact with toxic and abusive family members, and there’s nothing “malicious,” or criminal, or selfish, about it.

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Maureen February 22, 2010 at 12:57 pm

@Mark and @Lee thank you for your comments.

However, the law I’m proposing will protect people that are disappearing for their own personal safety. I might add that was not the case in numerous of the cases of the maliciously missing. See Peace4 the Missing where data is being gathered on the maliciously missing: http://peace4missing.ning.com/group/maliciouslyonpurposemissing

The physically abused are protected with laws. You can have your abuser(s) arrested and face your abuser in court. The families of the maliciously missing can’t do that. Yet the emotional and financial abuse that is experienced is just as devastating as physical abuse directly due to the selfish, cowardly acts of the maliciously missing.

My law is in no way giving up privacy. It’s just a humane way to let the families know that it is the wish of the person disappearing that they are starting a new life. The police will not be required to tell the families where their family member is just that they are alive and this is their wish to vacate their life. In fact for people in abuse situations it is exactly why I put in the law that the person vacating their life can go to any law enforcement in the country and sign a statement that this is what they are doing. It gives the person distance from their abuser.

For the truly maliciously missing it should be a criminal act. How legal is it to walk out on not only your family and friends but all of your financial responsibilities? In many of these cases these were spouses with good jobs, had mortgages to pay, had children who they were responsible for both emotionally and financially. Because there was no legal protection for me I lost everything in just a couple months time…we had been married 24 years at the time he went maliciously missing. There was no law protecting me. Creditors, banks, lawyers, courts don’t understand the word “missing.” How fair was it for me, his children and his friends to search for his bones for 4 years?

For 4 years I couldn’t even fill out a simple form. Everyone else in the world can answer the question “What is your marital status?” There was no box to check for “Other.”

If you leave a dog on the side of the road it’s a punishable crime. If you leave your family on the side of the road and pretend your dead for 4 years it’s all good because you’re starting a new life? Really is that humane, logical and legal thinking?

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Vivian June 30, 2010 at 4:11 am

I think this law would violate the unreasonable search and seizure
protection in the Bill of Rights.
If someone wishes to leave, and they have no young children, then
they have the right to leave. Americans are not required to report
their movements to anyone unless they are on parole/probation.
This law would be like putting the whole nation on parole. I will
never ask anyone’s permission to go anywhere. I also will not
want my husband or grown son to be forced to ask anyone’s permission either.
I have sympathy for the person who wrote this law, but I refuse to
allow anyone to be punished because she cannot accept that she married a jerk.

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